Opinions Are Like...
Every once in a while, someone, under the guise of civility, says something outrageous and uncivil. Just because you couch it in “nice,” doesn’t mean you aren’t being a dick.
Here’s an email I got after my gig in New York.
“Titus, I have been a fan for years and even mourned when your show got cancelled after 3 great seasons. But i got to tell you that you lost me this past weekend at Caroline’s. This election was so rough on everybody, the winners and losers, and unless the jokes are incredible and most them unfortunately were not, they just rehash those bad feelings. People pay good money to escape reality and have a few laughs. You know that by now. You finally wised up to finally throw away your new political material, it’ s just a shame you didn't do it 30 min earlier. Nobody wants to pay to hear a comedian bicker with an audience member for that long. We came to see you, your old material is amazing, please stick with it. Best of luck, mate.”
Listen, your opinion is your opinion, and please vote with your dollars. Here is my response.
“Mate,
Thanks for the critique, guess what, I have 4 people that didn't like it and 800 who said I was genius. So, if you believe you can say what you want to an artist and get him to change what he does, wow! That's pretty ballsy and I appreciate that. So let me come back at you with the same
honesty. Since 5th Annual End of the World Tour, I have been political, as in, Iraq war, 911, Arm the children, I'm whitey and I apologize, Bush, Obama, blah blah blah. You didn't bitch then. I do understand that as a Trump supporter, this man has horribly embarrassed you. But, because you voted or support BY FAR the worst President we have had in my life (and I'm including Nixon and the president of Enron) is on you. You made a mistake-- A HUGE ONE. Face it, own it and laugh about it. I made fun of BOTH sides that night and I will tell you what, If you laughed at Obama jokes and Clinton jokes, and can't laugh at Trump jokes, well then frankly you are UnAmerican and part of the problem. I do realize that this will probably end any support from you and although It's not what I want, I can live with it. I have always told the truth on stage and gone after things other comedians fear to talk about.
When this show is done, I will do the same thing on a new subject. But let me ask you, who do you think you are, honestly? To tell me, 7 90-minute specials in, that you NOW have a problem because the subject matter got you butt hurt? And to be clear I didn't stop doing or "throw away" the material, I ran out. And if you couldn't hear the hard laughter up ‘til then, then you are as thinned skinned and delusional as the Orange Alzheimers patient currently residing in the White House. I'm still writing this show because EVERY DAY there is a new nightmare. Your letter didn't make me rethink. It made me commit even harder to this new show. Mark Twain, Will Rogers, Mort Sahl, Bill Maher, George Carlin, Robin Williams all talked about this world and what was going on. I will continue to do so. You have some balls to tell me to stop using the right the Constitution gives me. Interesting how Trump people bitch about the Constitution, yet want to wipe their ass with it when they disagree with someone else exercising their rights.
Please DO NOT come to another one of my shows. You're not welcome until you can laugh at yourself and your mistakes, as I have my entire career. Did I offend you? If JOKES offended you how come you are not offended by
Trump:
-Pissing off Australia
-Not showing his taxes
-Saying Obama was a Kenyan and not American, FOR FIVE YEARS
-Assaulting women
-Pissing off Germany
-Killing the EPA
-Screwing up healthcare
-3 Bankruptcies
-writing off 912m in taxes
-Pissing off China
-Screwing with the UN
-Ending Meals on Wheels
-Ending PBS and early education.
-Screwing up education worse than it already is
-Hurting Seniors with the new health care cost.
-Banning countries THAT HAVE NEVER ATTACKED US!
Or, how about this? Lying about: Taxes, Russia, Clinton, Wiretapping, inaugural size, the wall, healthcare, Israel, investments, being peed on by Russian hookers, and 1000 other things including his penis size DURING A DEBATE! Or, his rape allegations, college con that he paid 25 million for... shall I keep going?
Oh yeah, The head of EXXON is now SECRETARY OF STATE! A man who has oil contracts with the killer and thug Putin. How do you NOT talk about it? Honestly, one of us cares a lot more about his country than the other. You figure out who. And as long as this man continues to lie, cheat and con my fellow Americans I will stand, punchlines firing, until he is gone or ENTIRELY changes who he is. Again, you're not allowed at my shows until you face facts, admit your mistakes and become self aware.
This response shouldn't surprise you if you are the fan you say you are… uh, were. Thanks for your letter.
Titus
To all of you who think because you came to a show or two you can tell anyone what and how to do their job, you are delusional. I can’t imagine the night I met Springsteen that I would have told him to stop being so “Political.” “Just use Thunder Road, dingus and let’s dance.” Not everything I do will agree with you, and you should be happy about that, because if it did, I would just be another pandering, ass-sucking hack, and no one wants that.
I’m Christopher Titus and this...
